I started as a junior editor at a business tech research firm in September 2012. This was a major change for me coming from a retail background where I was on my feet eight hours a day surrounded by fellow employees who were usually very chatty. I loved putting on my headphones and logging into my computer and essentially working by myself...for about two weeks. Then I became somewhat bored/lonely and frustrated. The only people close to my age were the co-ops who are only around for four months and who seemed to be very outgoing and somewhat intimidating to my introverted self. I've since become a bit more social with the people in cubicles around me, but considering I still commute an hour each way everyday I'm not one for hanging out after work and I usually get lost when they tell me the places/bars they went to on the weekend.
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June 2013 I got the opportunity to go to a work-sponsored conference and jumped at it. They paid for my admission, my hotel room, and my flight.
The conference was the annual Editor's Association of Canada (EAC) Conference. I had attended a EAC seminar a couple months prior and enjoyed myself, and the senior editors at my company seemed excited about someone going to the conference as they were unable to go.
The schedule seemed interesting, with a variety of sessions that ranged from pure fun to pure business. I chose a couple of the first and a couple that approached the second.
What I didn't realize is that the biggest benefit to going to the conference, and indeed being a member of the EAC, is the networking opportunity. I had stumbled onto a in-house editing job almost right out of school and had never really planned to be an editor, hence I never had to network to pick up freelance jobs/internships like many start out doing. I hate small talk and shy away from meeting new people and suddenly I was trapped at an event where I was expected to do both, in addition to participating in the sessions and talking about my job [which I tend to have a hard time doing: "in-house editor/producer at a tech firm" never seems to be enough for people. I bet "editor at [insert publishing house]" is much more self-explanatory and less prone to questioning].
Suffice it to say I was surrounded by mostly women who wanted to know 1) where I'm from, 2) what do I do, and 3) do I have any connections to possible freelance jobs. My answers 1) London/KW/Toronto depending on my level of frustration regarding commuting, 2) editor at a tech research firm [always leading to more questions about what I edit and why], and 3) No. Of course from there the conversations either went towards politics/current events [which I tend not to follow closely enough to remember or don't have an opinion on], the conference itself [the "how's the weather" type of question when scrambling for conversations at a conference], or way too personal conversations about menstrual cramps, pregnancy/child-rearing [I don't have kids], or the inability of some men to find a clitoris/g-spot [I was shocked too when this came up]. I don't even talk about those last things with my best friend of 13+ years.
I survived the reception somehow and even the next day during breaks with my usual "smile and nod" technique and trying to ask as many questions as possible to redirect the attention off of me and pretending to pay attention. The last day I gave up. I sat by myself for most of the day and kept my head down except when someone from the previous day came to say "Hello." I even shared a cab ride with two other women to the airport without too much awkwardness [thanks to a chatty driver]. I was ignored at the airport except for the typical "Did you hear/understand that announcement?" and I drove home a midnight to a wonderfully silent house.
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I've come to the conclusion that I need to get out and be more social so I've created a personal goal to be more involved in the fall [most groups have shut down for the summer]. I plan to join the K-W twig [the local EAC group] and participate as much as possible there and at work. I also plan to actually move to London to stop commuting which will give me more time to potentially be social as well as erase the "location confusion" when I say I work in London, live in K-W, fly out of Toronto.
I'll always be an introvert, but maybe I can become a chatty introvert...at least at conferences.
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